2. Make Peace with Imperfection

I've yet to meet an absolute perfectionist whose life was filled with
inner peace. The need for perfection and the desire for inner
tranquility conflict with each other. Whenever we are attached to
having something a certain way, better than it already is, we are,
almost by definition, engaged in a losing battle. Rather than being
content and grateful for what we have, we are focused on what's wrong
with something and our need to fix it. When we are zeroed in on what's
wrong, it implies that we are dissatisfied, discontent.
Whether it's related to ourselves - a disorganized closet, a scratch on
the car, an imperfect accomplishment, a few pounds we would like to lose
- or someone else's "imperfections" - the way someone looks, behaves, or
lives their life - the very act of focusing on imperfection pulls us
away from our goal of being kind and gentle. This strategy has nothing
to do with ceasing to do your very best but with being overly attached
and focused on what's wrong with life. It's about realizing that while
there's always a better way to do something, this doesn't mean that you
can't enjoy and appreciate the way things already are.
The solution here is to catch yourself when you fall into your habit of
insisting that things should be other than they are. Gently remind
yourself that life is okay the way it is, right now. In the absence of
your judgment, everything would be fine. As you begin to eliminate your
need for perfection in all areas of your life, you'll begin to discover
the perfection in life itself.

1. Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

Often we allow ourselves to get all worked up about things that, upon
closer examination, aren't really that big a deal. We focus on little
problems and concerns and blow them way out of proportion. A stranger,
for example, might cut in front of us in traffic. Rather than let it
go, and go on with our day, we convince ourselves that we are justified
in our anger. We play out an imaginary confrontation in our mind. Many
of us might even tell someone else about the incident later on rather
than simply let it go.
Why not instead simply allow the driver to have his accident somewhere
else? Try to have compassion for the person and remember how painful it
is to be in such an enormous hurry. This way, we can maintain our own
sense of well-being and avoid taking other people's problems personally.
There are many similar, "small stuff" examples that occur every day in
our lives. Whether we had to wait in line, listen to unfair criticism,
or do the lion's share of the work, it pays enormous dividends if we
learn not to worry about little things.
So many people spend so much of their life energy "sweating the small
stuff" that they completely lose touch with the magic and beauty of
life. When you commit to working toward this goal you will find that
you will have far more energy to be kinder and gentler.